Moving to another country? Some do’s and don’ts

That’s it! Your decision is made, you are going to take that huge leap of faith and move to another country!
While that sounds like an awesome and exciting prospect to some people (while scary for a lot of others), there are still a few things to consider, if you don’t want to be back to your home country after a few weeks or months, feeling dejected.

To make sure you are off to a good start, here is my list of do’s and don’ts. It comes from my personal experience moving from France to the USA, but I believe some of these points (if not all of them) are relevant for other countries as well.

1. If you don’t know the language, learn it QUICK

To me it was quite evident that I wouldn’t be moving to a country if I did not know the language already.
But that might not be always the case. In that instance, I cannot stress enough the fact that learning the language is probably the most important thing that you can do on arrival.
Ideally you would have at least a knowledge of that language before you leave your home country, and you will learn much faster when in situation.
Not knowing the language of the country you are moving in is going to set huge hurdles for you.
It is already difficult enough to learn new ways, if you can’t understand people, the road signs or even what is written on the packages of the products you want to buy at the supermarket, you are setting yourself for failure.

2. Learn the basics of the culture and be aware of the differences

First and foremost, if you move to another country with the strong belief that your home country culture is the best in the world, then don’t go! Why would you leave all that perfection for something else that cannot possibly hold to your standards?

Also do not assume you know everything there is to know about the country, just because you spent some vacation there.

I learned so much about the American culture since I have been here and I cannot say that I didn’t know anything about it in the first place.
I have been here on vacation twice, the French television is full of American movies and TV shows, our news follow what is happening here on a daily basis.

But there are still a lot of differences that you need to learn.
I think it’s great if you know the basics before you actually move and then proceed at your own pace to learn the rest while you are here.
For example, I was aware of the tipping economy, but living it every day is another experience entirely and I am sometimes missing it while not on purpose.
In France the tips are included in your bill. As we say “Le service est inclus”, “Service is included”.
So a lot of people don’t tip because they feel they have done it already, and if the service has been outstanding they usually leave something more, although rarely 20% like I see a lot of people do here.
The trouble is we have a lot of waiters and waitresses who don’t feel the need to be friendly because they don’t rely on the tips to make a decent living.
So I am sorry for that because it does not reflect well on my home country but if you go to Paris and visit the touristy places, it is quite likely that you will encounter a lot of rude people when you ask for a coffee in a café.
And I, for one, am always pleasantly surprised by the friendliness and professionalism of most waiters here in the USA.

3. Be friendly but not overly so

I cannot stress enough the importance of talking to people in a friendly way, smile and all. That will usually get you a lot of bonus points.
But although you want to appear friendly you do not want to appear overbearing.
Keep in mind the cultural differences once again: for example, in France, people usually kiss (on the cheek) people they know well (unless they are business associates). That alone is so weird to many Americans!

4. Ask questions

Talking to people is a great way to learn the ways of the country, so ask questions! Most people I meet are happy to answer my questions about everything American.

Again try to refrain from judging, before you fully understand the whole picture. Cultures have a different way to evolve, and you don’t always know what happened in the past that explains where the country is at now.

A really good example for me is the right to keep and bear arms, also known as the 2nd Amendment of the American Constitution.
Most French people have a hard time understanding why citizens would even want to own guns (apart from hunters obviously, which is not a category of people really well loved in France).
When I arrived in the USA, I have to admit that I came with my belief that the 2nd amendment was something outdated and while I understood where it was coming from, I couldn’t quite understand why it would still be so relevant to so many people here.
And while I am still not totally convinced that people need guns (especially army-type weapons), I understand now that this all come from a strong belief that you have to be able to protect yourself and your family, possibly even against the tyranny of your own government.
Now I do not want to go into politics here but having heard both sides, I understand better where people who strongly believe in the 2nd Amendment come from.

5. Try new things

I am the kind of person who like to try new things when I am on vacation in a foreign country, so it was not a big hurdle for me.
I think one of the best examples here is food and cuisine.
Then again, I know a lot of people who won’t try local food when they go on a trip. And this is something I don’t quite get.
What is the point of visiting another country if not to understand their culture a bit better?
Unless you only go on vacation abroad to spend a week on a beach on your own or in an all-inclusive resort. And even then there are plenty of opportunities to try new foods.
I am certainly not advocating for trying things that would make you physically sick, but to me, discovering the local cuisine is usually one of the highlights of my vacation.
Again I do not quite get people who go abroad and then expect to be eating exactly what they eat at home.
Trying new things allows you to discover new worlds of sensations that you are unfamiliar with but which could end up rocking your world!

As a conclusion, keep a VERY open mind!

When you arrive in another country, it is almost impossible not to judge the people, the customs, the food, the lifestyle, etc. by your own standards. After all, you have developed those standards over decades of living in your home country, so they are pretty well in place in your subconscious.
While you can’t really expect to be able to not compare the two cultures, you can and should in my opinion refrain from judging from the get-go.
There are reasons why the culture is where it is at right now and until you know those reasons you are ill-equipped to pass judgment.

Do you think there are important points that I forgot? Let’s discuss that in the Comments section!